16 Feb 2017

Peppa Pig: A Dystopian Horror

It is Monday morning, and Daddy Pig has gone to visit Dr Brown Bear for his check up.
"Ah!" says Dr Brown Bear "Daddy Pig! How have you been?"
"Well" replies the overweight, voluble swine "I keep having headaches Dr Brown Bear and strange flashes"
"Flashes? What kind of flashes?"
"Oh ha ha ha ha" says Daddy Pig "Flashes where I think I'm not a pig" Ha ha ha ha"
Dr Brown Bear opens a drawer. He takes the pre-prepared syringe. He turns, slaps Daddy Pig on the shoulder and slips the needle into his porky shoulder. "Sounds like you're working too hard"
Daddy Pig's eyes go blank, his mirthful face empty for a moment. "Yes. Too hard. Goodbye" He walks out, mechanically.

Madame Gazelle also visit Dr Brown Bear. Her purpose is somewhat different. She is hoarse, angry, agitated.
"Madame Gazelle! What ever is the matter?"
"The children, Dr Brown Bear, their incessant chattering! The Bing Bong Song! I smell their blood pulsing through them and I yearn for a taste. One taste, Dr Brown Bear, one taste. Freddy Fox, he would never know, he wouldn't know".
Dr Brown Bear nods. They have been here before. He goes to the fridge and passes her a bag of blood. She drinks it in one gulp. The shakes subside, her voice becomes normal.
"Thank you, Dr Brown Bear"
He smiles and waves her out. She will be back in a month.

Miss Rabbit remembers. She doesn't tell the others, but she remembers. She was a career woman, the opposite of her sister, the fecund Mrs Rabbit. She could do anything and she did and that memory is what drives her through this charade. She was a person once. Her name was Rosa. She was going to marry Bert...Mr Bull...but they changed. They went to sleep people and they woke up animals.

Dr Hamster has been known to help Dr Brown Bear with keeping the others subdued in this bizarre experiment. She was a vet before and she's a vet now, and nobody notices the paradox of a pig owning a fish, a bird. She is paid well for her compliance, by whoever They are. She never sees them. She knows they are there, watching, thousands of them glued to their screens seeing what happens when different species share a common language and habitat. The experiment only really succeeds because of her, and Dr Brown Bear and sometimes the guilt drives her mad. And when it does, she goes to the mountain beauty spot, and she stares out and makes her peace. It is better in here than out there. It is safe.



No comments:

Post a Comment